Post by Chris on Dec 26, 2005 17:55:51 GMT
Copy of the match report for reference. The original report, with pictures, is on the Pissboy World Cup website.
First Round Match: Euan "Glasgow" Glasgow v Iain McDougall
Christ. What a match.
This was the most anticipated match of the first round. The clash of the titans. Two best friends, two big drinkers, but only one winner.
This particular match started at around 8pm on a Friday night, where Euan, Iain and the referees for the match (Greig and myself) began playing a game of Sammy Burns in Iain’s flat. Glasgow’s shouting and talking nonsense began almost immediately, as expected, while Iain tried (and succeeded) to keep the atmosphere at a nice level with a selection of jazz music. He also insisted on having Apocalypse Now playing on a muted TV in the background, which was slightly bizarre and disturbing but it kept him happy. The mood amongst the Pissboys was optimistic and cheerful as we finished our last round of cards and decided to head off to the pub.
The mood was about to be shattered.
Upon entering the Blue Blazer, Glasgow decided that everyone should have a pint of Dark Island each, a particularly rich and evil looking beer. This seemed to be a sound tactic, but it eventually turned against him when Iain proved to enjoy the beer more than Glasgow did, and he challenged him to a downing competition. The beer ended up being too much for Glasgow to take, and he didn’t finish downing his pint. Iain meanwhile not only downed his own pint in one go, but then decided to down mine as well. He then spent the rest of the night downing bottles of beer at every opportunity he could get, regardless of whether they were actually his or not, much to the delight of the Pissboy referees.
Glasgow did earn himself a lot of points by becoming extremely frustrated at everyone who was present, and shouting like a madman about ridiculous subjects. This included threatening John every five seconds and asking him in a loud voice if he could drink a glass of his blood. At some point he also downed a half pint of beer which someone had put a fag end in, then said calmly “I can feel it lodged in my throat”. And then kept drinking.
Iain was becoming visibly more and more pissed, and after witnessing Greig Shooting The Boot in his Pissboy match against John, he decided he would do the same. Greig handed over his Adidas Samba, poured a pint in, and Iain downed it in one then slammed the boot onto his head. A million points.
The second half of the match took place at an 80’s night in the Citrus Club, but not before Glasgow decided to beat the crap out of two of his mates on the way there, dragging them around the streets of Edinburgh in a fine pair of headlocks.
Euan’s finest moment came in the Citrus Club, as he flailed around on the dance floor for about 10 minutes, throwing his limbs all over the place and occasionally falling on his arse. He then started screaming at everyone in the immediate vicinity that he was trying to breakdance. Needless to say, most of the club’s patrons were a little terrified at the sight of a giant with big hair throwing himself around and screaming. This wasn’t the end of his drunken dancing though – he spent the rest of the night skanking wildly to every song that came on, regardless of whether it was ska or not. Fantastic.
Iain also spent most of the time in the Citrus Club dancing drunkenly, but his efforts weren’t anywhere near as impressive as Glasgow’s. However, he did win some points for trying to put his arm around everyone and telling them how much of a good night he was having.
The journey back to Iain’s flat proved to be just as entertaining as the rest of the night, as Iain’s aggressive side came through and he decided he was going to fight Glasgow, or as he put it, “fuck him up”. This resulted in Iain chasing Glasgow round the streets for a while, before finally catching him, throwing him into a metal barrier, and punching him around a bit. Glasgow’s repeated cries of “I don’t deserve this!” went unnoticed, and he had to eventually make a run for it to stop the violence. He then spent the next ten minutes hiding behind a van. When Iain was asked what Euan had done to him to make him want to beat the crap out of him, he drunkenly slurred “Nothing really, but it’s the Pissboy World Cup.” That’s dedication for you.
Once the riot ended, it was back to the flat for a few more games of Sammy Burns to end the night. The rest of the night was pretty uneventful, however Iain did manage to fit in some pipe smoking.
This was a tough match to call. Both competitors were on top form all night, and the referees were left in a difficult position. We’ve spent two whole days discussing the various points of the match and who we think should go through. It’s been hard, but a decision has been made.
Our condolences go to Iain. An absolutely fantastic effort, worthy of a true Pissboy, but the decision is that Glasgow only just managed to win the match. But you can leave the competition with your head held high, or possibly in a gutter. We’ll let you decide.
Keep on your dancing shoes, Euan Glasgow. You’re not leaving yet.
Verdict: Euan Glasgow marginal win. Congratulations.
First Round Match: Euan "Glasgow" Glasgow v Iain McDougall
Christ. What a match.
This was the most anticipated match of the first round. The clash of the titans. Two best friends, two big drinkers, but only one winner.
This particular match started at around 8pm on a Friday night, where Euan, Iain and the referees for the match (Greig and myself) began playing a game of Sammy Burns in Iain’s flat. Glasgow’s shouting and talking nonsense began almost immediately, as expected, while Iain tried (and succeeded) to keep the atmosphere at a nice level with a selection of jazz music. He also insisted on having Apocalypse Now playing on a muted TV in the background, which was slightly bizarre and disturbing but it kept him happy. The mood amongst the Pissboys was optimistic and cheerful as we finished our last round of cards and decided to head off to the pub.
The mood was about to be shattered.
Upon entering the Blue Blazer, Glasgow decided that everyone should have a pint of Dark Island each, a particularly rich and evil looking beer. This seemed to be a sound tactic, but it eventually turned against him when Iain proved to enjoy the beer more than Glasgow did, and he challenged him to a downing competition. The beer ended up being too much for Glasgow to take, and he didn’t finish downing his pint. Iain meanwhile not only downed his own pint in one go, but then decided to down mine as well. He then spent the rest of the night downing bottles of beer at every opportunity he could get, regardless of whether they were actually his or not, much to the delight of the Pissboy referees.
Glasgow did earn himself a lot of points by becoming extremely frustrated at everyone who was present, and shouting like a madman about ridiculous subjects. This included threatening John every five seconds and asking him in a loud voice if he could drink a glass of his blood. At some point he also downed a half pint of beer which someone had put a fag end in, then said calmly “I can feel it lodged in my throat”. And then kept drinking.
Iain was becoming visibly more and more pissed, and after witnessing Greig Shooting The Boot in his Pissboy match against John, he decided he would do the same. Greig handed over his Adidas Samba, poured a pint in, and Iain downed it in one then slammed the boot onto his head. A million points.
The second half of the match took place at an 80’s night in the Citrus Club, but not before Glasgow decided to beat the crap out of two of his mates on the way there, dragging them around the streets of Edinburgh in a fine pair of headlocks.
Euan’s finest moment came in the Citrus Club, as he flailed around on the dance floor for about 10 minutes, throwing his limbs all over the place and occasionally falling on his arse. He then started screaming at everyone in the immediate vicinity that he was trying to breakdance. Needless to say, most of the club’s patrons were a little terrified at the sight of a giant with big hair throwing himself around and screaming. This wasn’t the end of his drunken dancing though – he spent the rest of the night skanking wildly to every song that came on, regardless of whether it was ska or not. Fantastic.
Iain also spent most of the time in the Citrus Club dancing drunkenly, but his efforts weren’t anywhere near as impressive as Glasgow’s. However, he did win some points for trying to put his arm around everyone and telling them how much of a good night he was having.
The journey back to Iain’s flat proved to be just as entertaining as the rest of the night, as Iain’s aggressive side came through and he decided he was going to fight Glasgow, or as he put it, “fuck him up”. This resulted in Iain chasing Glasgow round the streets for a while, before finally catching him, throwing him into a metal barrier, and punching him around a bit. Glasgow’s repeated cries of “I don’t deserve this!” went unnoticed, and he had to eventually make a run for it to stop the violence. He then spent the next ten minutes hiding behind a van. When Iain was asked what Euan had done to him to make him want to beat the crap out of him, he drunkenly slurred “Nothing really, but it’s the Pissboy World Cup.” That’s dedication for you.
Once the riot ended, it was back to the flat for a few more games of Sammy Burns to end the night. The rest of the night was pretty uneventful, however Iain did manage to fit in some pipe smoking.
This was a tough match to call. Both competitors were on top form all night, and the referees were left in a difficult position. We’ve spent two whole days discussing the various points of the match and who we think should go through. It’s been hard, but a decision has been made.
Our condolences go to Iain. An absolutely fantastic effort, worthy of a true Pissboy, but the decision is that Glasgow only just managed to win the match. But you can leave the competition with your head held high, or possibly in a gutter. We’ll let you decide.
Keep on your dancing shoes, Euan Glasgow. You’re not leaving yet.
Verdict: Euan Glasgow marginal win. Congratulations.